A Hard Lesson to Learn

This week was a tough one.  We received some terrible news on Tuesday that some dear friends of ours delivered a full term stillborn baby.  This was shocking news indeed.  I felt like it shook me to the core and I'm still in tears every time I think about it.  Baby Maddox was due to enter this world to 2 loving parents anxiously expecting his arrival right before Christmas.  To receive the news that your baby no longer has a heartbeat after carrying it in your womb (successfully I might add) for 39 weeks is beyond unbearable - it's completely incomprehensible.  This is certainly one of those times when you just look up at God and question what His plan could possibly be through this?  It's been a delicate week as all of their friends/family have tried to tenderly minister to their broken hearts.

Needless to say, it has certainly made Chris and I step back and be reminded of the gift we have been given through this baby we are expecting in May.  I feel even more protective of it now than ever before.  I know that God ultimately controls what happens througout this pregnancy and after it is born, just like He did with Maddox, but I can still do everything in my power to protect it as much as possible,  Which brings me to my next point . . .

While sharing my sorrows with a friend this week, she reminded me that the worry for our children doesn't stop after we give birth, it will carry on into the rest of their lives.  She said that it's a daily struggle to wake up and purposefully remember that her son is not her own, he belongs to God, and ultimately it is God's protection and plan for his life that matters most.  She is simply a vessel that has been entrusted with the responsibility of taking care of him for as long as God allows on this earth.  To be honest, I hadn't really thought of that before.  But when hit with the news that we received this week, I am so grateful to have been taught that lesson now.

I'm reminded of the story in the Bible of Hannah and Samuel.  Hannah desperately prayed for a child for a very long time.  After a considerable time of waiting, The Lord blessed her with a son, Samuel.  In her dedication of Samuel to the Lord, she says "I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD."

What a sweet reminder of what it is we are specifically called to do as parents.  We can try and hold on to our children as tight as possible and protect them as much as possible, but we'll be doing ourselves a huge favor if we turn them over to the Lord to fulfill His plan for their lives instead.  And it would be a huge disservice to our children if we didn't teach them this valuable lesson about God's sovereignty and perfect plan for us all.  This is not to say that the responsibility of parenthood is easier as a result, but it can certainly be more peaceful.

So to our dear friends, Andrew and Amanda, we are mourning your loss with you but are grateful for the testimony you have shown us as expecting parents and pray that we are able to handle life's tragedies as well as you are thanks to the saving grace of Jesus Christ and the intercession of the holy spirit in our hearts.

Christmas Time is Here

Christmas is upon us in full force!  As previously mentioned, I've been super jazzed about the holidays this year (there's no explanation whatsoever for that except that perhaps I'm just really looking forward to what's to come next year).  This year I wanted to change up the look of our holiday decor a little bit.  Typically it's just the standard array of decorations that we've collected over the years - none of which match or make any decorating sense whatsoever :)  So this year I wanted to spruce the place up a bit!  I spent countless hours on my new favorite website (pinterest) looking for improved decorating ideas.  I think we did pretty good :)  The best part is that MOST (not all) of the decorations were from the Dollar Store of all places!  If you get there early enough, they have an amazing assortment of fabulous holiday finds :)

view of our living room from the dining room

our 2011 mantel

2011 red and gold Christmas tree

our poinsettia and pinecone garland.  I'm especially proud of this project :)  I had found a similar 6' garland at Hobby Lobby on sale (50% off) for $30.  I knew it was going to take a least 3 strands to cover our staircase and spending $90 was completely out of the question!  So I went to Wally world instead and bought an 18' pre-lit garland and 3 6' poinsettia/pinecone garlands, strung them together and voila . . . a $90 concept for a $25 sticker price.  Not a bad compromise at all!

our breakfast nook ready to welcome our guests for dinner

our first Christmas dinner party with our "new" dining room furniture

first time in 8 years we've been able to display our Christmas china!  This means a lot to me as it was a specific gift from my parents when I was first married.

just another view of the living room/foyer from the dining room

All in all, I think we did a pretty good job with the limited resources we had to spare.  It sure it nice and cozy to come home too as well!  It's really beautiful all lit up!  I just love the magic of the holidays :)

It's a DIY Kind of Christmas!

I don't know why, but for some strange reason I am super excited about the holiday season this year.  I know it's not gonna be the same - there won't really be presents, both sides of the family are under a lot of stress, and it will be my first christmas ever without my dad - but despite all of that, the magic of christmas is still in the air!  I decided to change up our christmas decor this year to something hopefully a little more snazzy (to be displayed in a later post).  I've been spending a lot of time on favorite blogs and pinterest to help gain a little inspiration.  There were a few little projects that I just loved, so I decided to give them a try over the weekend.  I apologize for the bad pictures, wasn't really planning to post them so they're not the best quality or angle :(

First Project: The Ornament Wreath

I loved everything about this project!  It was SO easy and the best part is that all the supplies needed I either already had or I purchased at the Dollar Store!  All you do is take a wire coat hanger and start threading the christmas ornaments onto it until it's nice and full.  Then twist the ends at the very top and add some ribbon so you can hang it from the door hook.  Voila!  Thats it!  It cost me about $10 in supplies and about 1 hour of my time :)  I plan to hang this wreath on the front door and then put 2 more on the french doors in our dining room :)

Second Project: Christmas Canvases



I saw this idea on "Thrifty Decor Chic" - one of my favorite blogs to follow.  The concept is simple.  Take 3 canvases, cover them in Christmas fabric, then spraypaint wooden letters in a corresponding color (I chose a glittery green).  I believe I will also frame them in thick white frames (minus the glass) and then we'll hang them on the wall above the mantel/fireplace.  This project cost me about $32 (a little more pricey - but all the associated costs are variable so you can make it cheaper if you need to) and about 2 hours of my time (mostly because of the time spent spraypainting and drying).  Can't wait to see how it looks over the mantel!

Third Project: Framed Christmas Prints

While I was wasting my time one day perusing through the countless ideas on Pinterest, I came across this idea.  The concept here is that you print off some Christmas prints (my favorite is the one on the right from "Elf"), matte/frame them, and then hang them on the wall using corresponding grossgrain ribbon (haven't done that part yet).  The prints were free b/c I was able to just print them directly off the website, the frames (11x14) are from the dollar store, and the mattes (8x10) are from Wal Mart.  This project cost me $9 and about 2 hours of time.  The frames did not come in white, I had to paint them - but it saved me a ton of money instead, so it was worth the extra time involved.  Love it!

I am really looking forward to getting all of these new projects out in the house and seeing how it all comes together!  Bring on the Christmas season!

Happy Halloween from the Harrell's!

This year for our annual Sunday School costume party, we decided not to go with a standard couples costume.  Chris felt "inspired" to dress up as our Sr. Pastor at church (Pastor Clint Pressley).  We drove around all day on Saturday to locate all the pieces of his costume (which mostly came from the ol' faithful Value Village and Party City).  My costume, on the other hand, was completely homemade (by both our hard-working hands) and it is by far my favorite cosstume of all!  I chose to go as a Bun in the Oven (lol).  I felt it was quite appropriate this year :)  Even though my costume required a little more "creativity", Chris still took home the coveted "Best Costume" award at the party (for the 4th time in a row).  Man he's good!

Tis the Season!

I know that it's still WAY too early to be thinking about Christmas, but I saw these 2 fabulous ideas on Pinterest today and I knew that if I didn't blog about them I would totally forget about them altogether!

First: A Christmas card AND newsletter in one!  I just love the idea!

Unfortunately, this will NOT be the year we will send these out.  Can't say I can even think of 10 good things worth listing on this card.  But next year will certainly be better (topping the list will be the birth of our child!).

Secondly, there's the smells of the season to help get you in that special holiday mood!  I just love when my house smells of apple and spices - reminds me of being at home in Raleigh and all the wonderful Christmases we had together as a family.

A Home Makeover

Our house is in serious need of a home makeover prior to the baby's arrival.  I just know that if we don't get it done before then, it'll never happen!  Here are a few ideas I found on Pinterest today that I really love!

Towel Rack - Guest Bathroom


Oil Rubbed Bronze Fixtures


Wall Photo Gallery
(pic won't display)

Master Bedroom

These are just a few little projects to help get us started (well . . . except for the whole bedroom makeover - but we've kind of got the ball rolling for that already anyways).  But before we can even tackle this small list, we have to finish our kitchen remodel, paint our 2-story foyer, and replace all the flooring downstairs (and eventually upstairs as well).  All within the next 6 months!  OH!  And create a baby nursery as well!!!!  Yikes!  There goes our social life for a while (lol)!

Sadie, Sadie, Pretty Lady

Meet my Sadie-girl!  Isn't she just precious?!  I could eat her up I love her so much!  4 years ago, while strolling through the pathways at Birkdale Village on a beautiful fall day, I saw her for the first time.  There she was, basking in the sun on the bright green grass, just as snuggly and precious as you can possibly imagine!  She was there as part of a dog-rescue/adoption awareness event and I knew right then and there that she NEEDED to be a part of our family!!!  We weren't looking for another dog (we already had Autumn), but something about her just struck a chord in each of us and we signed the papers that very day to bring her home.  What a delight she has been everyday since!  Sure, we've had our up's and down's . . . like the time when I walked into the house after work and saw the projectile poop all over my dining room wall, or when she ate nearly all of Chris's brand new rainbow sandals (just given to him as a Christmas present days before), and yes, there's always the incessant barking everytime she wants to go outside or play . . . but 90% of the time, she as perfect as a little angel and we couldn't feel more blessed!  She has added an element of joy and overall comfort to our home that has been missing for a long time and I can absolutely say that she has become more than just a dog to both of us, she is our best friend!

With great sadness, however, I must report that we received a phone call from her Vet yesterday informing us that she has been diagnosed with Lymphosarcoma (cancer of the lymph nodes).  My heart just sank.  We knew this was a possibility as we observed her over the last few weeks, but was really praying that it was only an infection and with time would simply go away.  We noticed the symptoms about a month ago.  Well, one major symptom really.  Her glands under her neck were quite swollen, but they seemed to vary in size on any given day.  Some days the swelling wasn't as bad as others.  So about 2 weeks ago, Chris did some basic research online and read that it could be anything from just an infection to, of course, cancer.  I had the day off of work on Monday, so I called in an emergency appt. at the Vet to have her looked at.  They took her blood and a sample of her white blood cells to send to the pathologist.  She said we'd know more in a few days after the results came back.  And even though she's in excellent health otherwise, she was fairly confident that the problem was indeed cancer.

So after countless hours of sobbing my eyes out (for like the hundredth time this year alone!) and spending every possible minute I have with Sadie, we have resolved to meet with the Oncologist to have her observed and staged and to go through our treatment options.  We don't want to impede on her quality of life in any way, but selfishly we'd like to prolong her life as much as possible.  You'd never know it to look at her, she's just as healthy and playful as any other dog of her age, and fortunately it doesn't appear to have spread to any of her internal organs, so we're hopeful that we'll be able to find a non-invasive treatment that will add to her quality of life for the remainder of the time we have with her, and not take anything away from it.

This is terribly depressing news for us indeed.  We have both become VERY attached to her over the years and it is unimagineable for us to think about life without her.  So as silly as it might sound, your prayers are certainly coveted . . . once again . . . as we deal with yet another bout of depressing news.

Chris & Sadie snuggling in the mtns last Thanksgiving

The girls first trip to Mt. Mitchell

Our precious little family of 4 (2010)

Mel's 30th Bday - Part II

Well, the big day has officially come and gone.  Already I've been asked how it feels to be 30.  Truthfully, not much different than it did when I turned 21 (which somehow depresses me when I really think about it) - lol.  My biggest regret about turning 30 is that I've concentrated so much of my adult life on growing up too fast and dealing with adult concerns way before my time, that I completely lost out on the plethora of opportunities that were before me while still in my "prime".  But nevertheless, life's difficult roads have led me to where I am to today, and for that I am still grateful.

Birthday weekend was wonderful.  The weather was gorgeous and it made me thankful to have been born in such a beautiful month of the year!  My mom and her sweet puppy dog (Cupcake) came to visit :)  Chris threw in a few surprises for me as well :)  The biggest surprise, I have to say, came from my sweet friend/co-worker, Kelly Norris.  To my extreme shock and awe, Kelly gave me a KitchenAid standing mixer for my birthday!!!  Dumbfounded does not even begin to describe how I felt when I unwrapped that box!  Sheer generosity just oozes out of that girl and I am extremely blessed just to know her!  But to give a gift like that is truly above and beyond and I don't even know how to go about thanking her for such a gift.  To help get the juices flowing, however, I did make my first batch of homemade Strong Family chocolate chip and pecan cookies with my new mixer (just for Kelly) . . . and they were amazing!  Chris said it was the best batch I've ever made!

But the very best moments of my 30th bday came from 2 very special people.  First, my mom.  It's been a difficult year for us all and the passing of my dad is still a very large and very real hurt that we are all trying to heal from a little more each day.  With that in mind, while at my celebratory dinner on Saturday night, my mom hands me a gift wrapped box.  Not really having any clue what it could be, I gingerly opened the box and found a small, black velvet drawstring bag inside.  I loosened the strings and pulled out a gold chain and a gold cross.  At first all I could see was that the chain was broken. And then I took a good look at the cross and realized that that cross necklace belonged to my dad when he was much younger.  It had broken so many years ago and he stopped wearing it.  But now I had the opportunity to weld it back together again and bring it back to life.  So many thoughts ran through my mind in that moment and it was terribly hard not to start crying right there in front of God and everybody.  So I kept my composure but made a mental note that that moment was what would make my 30th birthday memorable for the rest of my life.  Secondly, there's my precious husband, Chris.  After 8 years of marriage, Chris understands that for me, it's not the money spent or the number of gifts bought (although I DO love presents!), it's the little things that come straight for the heart that matter most to me.  There have been times in our life together when we have felt very estranged b/c other obligations have kept us from spending as much time together as we would have liked.  Therefore I always tell him that the gifts I love most are the cards he gives me b/c he always writes the most beautiful, heartfelt messages inside - a gift that shows me how much time he takes to leave everything else behind for a little while and focus solely on me.  So this year, for my 30th birthday, my overly-creative and oh so thoughtful husband made me the most wonderful card (one that I'll have with me for the rest of my life)!  He spent 3 days working on it!  It's ginormous too!  Easily 3 feet tall!  He made it out of foam board and all the craft supplies you can possibly imagine (lol).  My spare room upstairs is littered with paints, scissors, ribbons, markers, glue, stamps, etc . . . but it's so worth it!  I just LOVE it!  Now, the question is, where am I going to put it?!  I could leave it on display for a while, but it's gotta go somewhere eventually (lol).

All in all, my birthday was lovely and I realized just how fortunate I am to be surrounded by people in my life who love me uconditionally, know me wholly, and value time spent together more than dollars spent.

Here are a few snapshots of my 30th birthday:

My very own KitchenAid mixer! Wowzers!

my surprise ice cream birthday cake. The guy at Baskin Robbins wrote "31" instead of "30" - it was quite a revelation to discover I had aged another year already (lol)

Flowers my boss, Jim, had delivered to my house on Saturday

Stargazer Lilies are my favorite!

My AMAZING homemade birthday card from Chris :)

Mel's 30th Birthday - Part I

It's a big thing, turning 30.  Typically not something anyone truly looks forward to.  For me, I had a much different idea of where I'd be in life by the time I turned 30.  Married, 2 kids, stay-at-home mom, China adoption underway . . . it's funny how God can sometimes have entirely different plans for your life!  Needless to say, other than being married to my fabulous husband Chris, none of my other hopes and dreams have been fulfilled (yet).  The journey has definitely proven to be more arduous than anticipated back when I dreamily concocted "my" plan for my life at the ripe ol' age of 21!  However, one thing that HAS gotten better along the way is my relationships with others.  For so many years I searched and searched for "real", genuine, selfless, and unconditional friendships.  I was tired of the popularity games, constantly wondering whether or not I still made the cut among my current group of friends.  But with age comes insight and discernment which helps me choose the people I surround myself with more wisely.

One of the best blessings in life is finding those kinds of friendships in the workplace.  Our jobs may not always leave us feeling happy or confident, but the people you work with can be the one thing that changes that experience entirely.  I am fortunate to have many WONDERFUL friends at my workplace!  People who I truly believe are interested in sharing life with me, not just for now, but for always.  They're genuine and kind and always looking out for the needs of others around them.  Specifically speaking, there are 2 delightful young women who make my days SO much brighter at the office!  Jessica and Kelly have easily been what's kept me going on the days when the going gets tough.  Sometimes I wonder, if it weren't for their companionship, humor, and overall friendship . .. would I even make it through one day?  Oftentimes the answer is a resounding no!

This morning, as I walked into the office, I saw my sweet friend Jessica sitting at her desk.  This caught my attention as she is not normally in the office quite so early!  And as I rounded the corner towards my office cube, I suddenly realized why she was there.  My sweet and thoughful friend happily decorated my workspace with streamers, balloons, and gifts for my 30th birthday!  WHAT A SURPRISE!!!  It just made my whole day (AND the idea of turning 30 that much more bearable)!

Birthday Decorations!

Birthday Balloons!

She also gave me the funniest card . . .

Birthday Card

 . . . it's so fitting b/c I'm always complaining about how I can't accurately type via IM chat anymore b/c my nails keep growing so fast and are so long that i misspell everything all the time! lol (a personal pet peeve!).
But what made this card even funnier is what she wrote on the inside:

"Dear Melody, I thought this card quite captured our friendship at work! :)  I feel so blessed to have met you . . . it's not very often you find someone who shares a passion for 90's hip hop, Broadway musicals, AND Psalty the Singing Songbook! . . . " 

I just thought that was the funniest thing ever . . . and absolutely so true!

So today I feel like one very special girl . . . not b/c of the attention I received, but b/c of how blessed I am by the friendships around me.  Friendships are absolutely what make life easier to walk through every day (no matter what it might throw your way), and if you're lucky enough to have even one good friend to share life with, then you're just plain lucky enough.

An Unexpected Surprise

As many of you are aware, last week should have been one of the happiest of our lives.  On Tuesday, September 7th, are baby should have been born into this world.  It was a bittersweet day to say the least.  A lot of memories and old feelings bagan to flood my mind as I wrestled with the reality that I would not be meeting my baby boy/girl that day.  Remembering the loss of our baby naturally flowed right in to remembering the loss of my dad.  I remember so clearly the moment we told him the news and his reaction was exactly how I had imagined it to be.  And it broke my heart all over again realizing once more that I'll never have that opportunity to do over with him again.  I remember telling Chris that on the day our child is born (in the future), it will be the very best and very worst day of my life at the same time.  The idea of raising my family without him makes me weep uncontrollably and it's a hurt that is so vast it may never fully go away.  He told me once that he used to spend hours upon hours praying and crying out to God on our behalf for the child we so desperately longed for.  It pains me to no end that he'll never know (on this side of heaven) that his prayers were not in vain.  However, God heard his cries and saw fit to bless us once again . . .

On Thursday, August 25th, we received a phone call in the evening confirming that all of our adoption paperwork had been finalized and our phase 1 payment had been submitted and received on our behalf.  We were given the green light to go full-steam ahead at that point.  The media team would be contacting us within days and the race towards our baby had officially begun.

However, as is only fitting for the Lord's ironic and unpredictable timing, we were informed on Friday morning that we would be having a baby of our very own.  That's right, we are pregnant!  There are not enough words to express the sheer confusion and shock we felt in that moment.  Could this be real?  Was I reading that test correctly?  As I stood there, leaning over my bathroom sink, test in hand . . . I started shaking uncontrollably and at once I could not breathe.  I called Chris right away (at 7:30am on a Friday morning).  He was at Bible Study but he chose to answer his phone anyways b/c he knew it must be important if I was calling him in the middle of that.  I don't remember ever even saying hello, I just cried out the phrase "we're pregnant" and began sobbing like a baby!  As I sat there on the edge of my bed, shaking like crazy, my husband on the other end of the phone just started laughing!  WHAT?!  I did not find this to be one of those "humorous" moments.  Chris just found it fitting that God would choose to bless us once again at the exact same time we were approved for our adoption.  He said that we are now one of "those" couples who fall into that cliche.  I scheduled an appointment with the doctor that morning and the blood test came back postive!

Yesterday we experienced our first ultrasound with this pregnancy.  I had been feeling a lot of symptoms for weeks now, but I was still uncertain about what this ultrasound would reveal to us.  But the Lord was good and we were able to see our baby perfectly nestled away exactly how/where it was supposed to be.  And by sheer surprise, we heard the heartbeat as well!  It measured at 119 bpm which is a very strong and healthy rate.  That moment just overtook us completely and we sat in that room with tears in our eyes embracing our child for the very first time.

As we prepared to leave the doctor's office, my sweet doctor, whom I have been seeing for 4 years now, informed us that I would be transitioning out of her care (as my specialist) and into the care of my OB/GYN.  This news may have made me cry even more than hearing the heartbeat of my child - lol!  I didn't realize it would be so soon and I wasn't prepared for that yet.  So it's bittersweet for sure, but it's also a relief to know that she is confident enough in the viability of this pregnancy to turn me over to another team of doctors.  But I will forever be grateful for all she has been to us over the last 4 years.

And now, for the LONG awaited baby's "first" picture . . .

we'd like to introduce you to our baby!



Baby Harrell, 6 wks 6 days

 You can follow our progress on our new baby blog: And Baby Makes 3

8-Year Wedding Anniversary

Yesterday marked 8 years of marriage to the man I love!  We are so thankful to have persevered through the last 8 years together.  As we sat down to enjoy a celebratory meal last night, we recounted all the trials we've had to work through since the day we got married.  Truthfully speaking, we were pleased with ourselves for just getting beyond the first year! 

On August 2, 2003, we had every expectation that our new life together, which was just beginning, was sure to be a good one!  Just like every newlywed couple, we couldn't wait to embark on this new phase of life together!  And while it has definitely proven to be the very best decision (outside of salvation) that we have ever made, it brought with it a lot of struggles as well.  If we add it all up, these last 8 years have primarily been the worst years of our lives.  From the very beginning, we've had to endure separation from our families (physically and emotionally), suicide, job losses, loneliness, brain tumors, infertility/adoption, miscarriage, beytrayal, and death (to list a few).  To anyone on the outside looking in, or to anyone without the hope of a Savior, it would almost have seemed like a sure fit for divorce during any one of these trials.  Emotionally speaking, it required more of us at any given time than we were capable of giving on our own.

This leads me to 2 thoughts: 1. the idea of commitment in a marriage is not a suggestion, or even a hope, but rather an absolute requirement; and 2. A (fulfilling) marriage without Christ is not attainable nor sustainable at all.

If we were married under the pretense that we could "get out" at any time, especially when the going gets tough, then there's no chance in this world that we would have celebrated 8 years of marriage yesterday.  But because we were married under the truth that this union is eternal, selfless, sacrificial, and a convenant we entered into with God Almighty, we had every reason to fight.  And if we hadn't spent the time intentionally growing together as a unit and growing individually in our relationships with the Lord, then the umbrella of commitment would have been that much harder to stand up under.  We had to really learn how to depend on each other to meet our respective needs, but we also had to learn that we can't base our marriage on each other's ability to meet those needs alone, it was up to the Father to be that ultimate fulfillment for us.  Which leads me into thought number 2 . . . 

If you are choosing to live for yourself, to seek love and fulfillment solely from a spouse, or derive daily hope from another human being, you will be let down in every possible way imaginable.  Christ's example of love for His church is the ultimate destination point for joy, fulfillment, hope, and peace in every circumstance.  There's no way Chris could have met every need for me after we lost our baby and my father in the span of 3 short months just earlier this year.  If I didn't have the relationship with the Lord that it required of me at the time, I can honestly say that I might not have made it through to the other side.  There were days when it seemed so dark that I thought I'd never see the light again.  But then, as faithfully as always, God whispered His strength into my heart and gently reminded me that this life is not our own and this place is not our home and the valley is only for a short amount of time in the grand scheme of things.  He would pull us up and choose to bless us as a result of our obedience to Him in our individual relationships but also as a result of the deliberate choices in our marriage.   Without the leadership and example of Christ in our life together, we could have never persevered through the struggles we've encountered along the way.

While these last 8 years have been a challenge, completely unpredictable in every way, I am eternally grateful for the lessons I have learned, the reminder of our complete dependence on God for everything, and the countless ways it has caused us to "grow up" and think beyond ourselves; to draw strength during our most difficult seasons from the the One who promises to be all things for us at all times if we just choose to turn to Him for everything in this life.

So "happy anniversary" to my man, Chris Harrell.  Thank you for choosing to follow after God with complete and total devotion and for leading our family in a way which pleases His heart and mine :)

enjoying dinner at The Capital Grille in Uptown Charlotte

dangit if I forgot to wear flats for our anniversary picture!

An Evening with Old Friends

Let's be clear, by "old" I mean long-time friends, not OLD friends :)  Tonight we had the privilege of spending time with some dear friends over a homecooked meal.  I ask you, is there anything better?  I love catching up with friends I haven't seen in a long time and hearing all about their life.  And tonight, I especially loved seeing Rachel and Jared's beautiful children!  It's crazy to think that something as innocent as 2 friends that hung out in the same "circles" 15 years ago turned into marriage and 3 wonderful kids!  Rachel and I were best friends in high school.  I'm pretty sure we did absolutely everything together!  And BONUS, she was my neighbor too, so we just had a ball together all the time!  Jared entered our world shortly after and spent his remaining high school years with us, and before we knew it, they were saying "I Do" and he was whisking her off to the opposite side of the country (for nearly 10 years!!!).  But God has brought them back to North Carolina (Raleigh, in fact) and now I get to see them almost any time I want!!!  It's truly fabulous and I am so very excited to have them back!

Tonight was our long-awaited reunion dinner.  While planning our menu, I thought to myself . . . these folks have been in the north (Washington state) for too long, it's time to reacquaint them with sweet southern goodness :)  So we had a feast of rosemary chicken, collard greens, pepperjack macaroni and cheese, roasted parmesan potatoes, sweet corn bread, watermelon, and sweet tea.  It was delish and thoroughly enjoyed by all :)

Mmm Mmm Good!

And The Countdown Is On . . .

As you are aware, 4th of July is my FAVORITE holiday!  From the music to the food, it's by far one of the biggest days of the year for me!  In recognition of my uncontained excitement, I decided to wear red, white, and/or blue every day during the week leadng up to the 4th.  Each day I'll hop onto the blog and post that day's outfit to keep you in the loop (in hopes of adding a little to your own holiday excitement!).  So here you go:

Monday:

white pencil skirt (Marshalls), blue linen shirt (LOFT), red cardigan (LOFT),

& blue/white striped ballet flats (GAP)

(PS - this picture was taken at the very end of the day, hence all the wrinkles and tangly looking hair!)

Tuesday:

 khaki trousers (Banana Republic), navy silk blouse (Banana Republic), red/white polka dot scarf (H&M), brown leather peep-toe wedges (Nine West)

Wednesday:

white eyelet dress (LOFT), navy blue cardigan (Ann Taylor), red crocodile ballet flats (Wally World)

(PS - My friend, Jenn, totally surprised me by decorating my workspace for the 4th of July!!!)

Thursday:

navy trousers (Banana Republic), burgandy satin blouse (The Limited), jumbo pearls (Forever 21), navy strappy sandals (Rack Room Shoes)
(PS - Meet my BOA office peeps!  They were all so supportive of my love for this holiday that they all wore patriotic colors just for me!  A lot of the details can't be seen in this picture - accessories like jewlery or nail polish (lol) and of course shoes!  Aren't they fabulous ladies?!)

A Hidden Treasure

2 years ago while vacationing together as a family at Topsail Beach, I took this picture. 

My dad had just been presented with the option of "experimental chemotherapy" by the specialists over at Duke Hospital.  There he stood with his packets and folders of medical information to sort through and process while trying to decide if it was the right thing to do or not.  Immediately I felt this overwhelming uneasiness in my gut telling me this was not what he should do.  But the information told us otherwise so we agreed that he would proceed forward.  A couple of days later, early one morning, as the family was sitting out on the deck enjoying their morning coffee and breakfast, I came back inside and sat down in the window seat overlooking the intracoastal waterway, overlooking my dad.  Sitting there before me was his Bible and reading glasses.  Something in me told me to get up, grab my camera, and document that moment.  I'm glad I did.  This has become one of my favorite pictures of my dad.  It's so symbolic and representative of him and the moment that changed all our lives forever. 

Father's Day 2011 - Jesus, Joy, and All That Jazz

Today was father's day - my first without my dad here to celebrate with.  I wasn't sure how today was goinna be.  I was very hesitant given that his birthday (just 3 days ago) did not go well at all.  But I knew I had some powerful prayer warriors on my side throughout the day and I could really feel the strength that rose up from them.  While contemplating exactly how I wanted to approach this day, I arrived at the decision that I did not want it to be a sorrowful day.  There are far too many great things about my dad that still live on today that should be recognized and celebrated.  Instead, I rifled through my t-shirt drawer and pulled out one of the dearest and most beloved memories that my dad left behind . . . "Jesus, Joy, and All That Jazz".  This was a t-shirt he wore as a kid.  I stole it from him when I was in high school and I am SO glad that I never returned it - if for no other reason than to be able to wear it today.  I instantly knew that this was one way I wanted to publicly recognize my dad on his special day.  Not only did I get to share the story behind the t-shirt with those I came into contact with today, but just feeling it on me made me feel like he was right there with me.  Additionally, "Jesus, Joy, and All That Jazz" was also the legacy that he left behind.  I would dare say that outside of his family, these were the 3 MOST important components of life to him.  He lived each day joyfully serving the Lord and his family while using the gifts of music he was given to teach and inspire others.  What a fulfilling legacy to dwell on each and every day. 

I also spent a lot of time today thinking about the most valuable fatherly advice he ever gave me.  This was tough as I felt like his whole was one big lesson that I was meant to glean from.  But ultimately, it was the following phrase that I kept coming back to . . . "you live and die by your choices."  Truer words have never been spoken. 

And lastly, as a collector of the fabulous Willow Tree statues/ornaments, I felt like today was an appropriate day to add to that collection.  Each piece of the collection has been purchased for specific reasons - life change (marriage, children, etc.), celebration of friendship, or characteristics others have pinpointed in me - that have made up this collection to date.  So I wanted to purchase a statue in honor of my dad on this memorable day to add to the growing collection that is a summation of my life and everything that matters most to me.  Here is what I chose:

My Girls

Looking at you, I see wonder, joy, strength

This piece was directed by the models. The poses that the girls naturally assumed showed their relationship with their dad much better than I could have instructed them. Their father was the anchor—the girls fluttered around him. I got a sense of how the girls saw him as strong and reassuring. They looked at him with a “my dad can do anything” look. The dad was clearly having fun being with his daughters. I wanted to make this a two-way piece—the girls look to his strength and stability, and he looks to them as his greatest source of joy. I think the beauty of a good father/daughter relationship is in its duality. I hope the sentiment can be read from either perspective —father to daughters, or daughter to father.

Unfortunately I could not find a representation of 3 daughters (boo), but I thought that this piece summed us all up so well.  While only 2 daughters are shown, there are 3 very strong characteristics listed, and I believe each of us embody those qualities individually . . . something we undoubtedly learned from our father.

Today

Today . . .
we should be celebrating 53 years of your life,
eating ice cream cake and blowing out your candles . . .

Today . . .
you should be the first person I talk to;
I should be be able to wrap my arms around you and settle into the joy that you bring . . .

Today. June 16th. Today is your birthday.

Today I think back on birthday's past.  Celebrations in the backyard by the pool, at our timeshare at the beach, even our annual birthday lunches at the Kanki restaurant.  So many happy memories to choose from.  But the fondest memory I keep coming back to was during our family vacation in 2001 at Daytona Beach.  I remember the gift I gave to you.  It was a brown leather-bound scrapbook filled with my favorite photos of you and I together.  I remember slaving away at each photo meticulously editing them all to ensure that they were "just right".  Each in its neutral shades of sepia matching the overall rustic yet classic profile of this beloved gift.  I remember the butterflies I felt during the moments leading up to presenting you with this gift.  I remember thinking that it wasn't anything fancy, certainly nothing of any monetary value . . . yet this gift had more value (to me) than anything I could have every bought you from a store.  This gift was a labor of love.  One that I was proud of.  One that I hoped you would love as much as me.  And you did . . . you really did.

I remember seeing it months later laying beside your bed on the floor. I have no idea what it was doing there but I like to believe it was there because you looked at it often and wanted to keep it close by.  Maybe it helped you feel close to me since I was away at college at the time.  Maybe it gave you peace each night before you fell asleep because it reassured you that were in fact a great father to your children and were loved dearly for it.

As much as I wish you were here to celebrate your birthday together again, I know that you are celebrating in an entirely new way in heaven today.  And if you can't be with your girls here on this earth, you can at least be in the company of angels up there. 

So . . .

Today . . .
you are deeply missed;
but are in our fondest memories . . .

Today . . .
you are smiling your biggest smile;
you are youthful and sprightly and happy once again . . .

Today . . .
instead of feeling the effects of earthly aging,
you are made whole in the presence of our Creator . . .

Today is your birthday.  Happy Birthday to you, dad.

Overdue Post

Okay, so this post is about a month overdue, but it's still worth writing about :)  As many of you know, I am lucky enough to work for one of the nation's leading employers - Bank of America.  I love EV-ER-Y-TH-ING about my job!  From the mission statement to the Associates, it's a super great place to work!  Two of the biggest areas of focus across the Bank are associate satisfaction and community involvement.  As a result, it's not uncommon at all for teams to spend an afternoon playing laser tag or white water rafting to emphasize the importance of teamwork in our everyday environments.  Not to mention volunteering our time with Habitat for Humanity to help build houses for those less fortunate or serve food at the Men's Shelter of Charlotte.  Not only do we get the advantage of an occasional day free from the office environment to venture out and partake in these activities, but the Bank will also allow you to volunteer at an outside organization for up to 3 hours a week and get paid for it!  Now do you see why I love my job???  It's truly fantastic!

My friend, Jennifer, is the site lead for our Charlotte team.  She and I co-facilitated an Associate Engagement event back in early May.  We took the team to Lake Norman for a sunset dinner cruise!  A large buffet of amazing food, a customized soundtrack for the evening, and a laid-back environment were just a few of the main ingredients that contributed to a very successful event!  Here are a few pics of us on the boat:

The evening was so well-orchestrated (something we worked very hard on!).  The boat set sail at 7pm.  Dinner was served on the lower level from 7-8pm.  Then we took the par-tay upstairs and danced the next 2 hours away.  What a fun night it was!  It's so nice to step outside of the office environment and get to know people on a more personal (and relaxed) level.  I certainly learned a lot about my co-workers that night!

The very next day we volunteered at the Mens Shelter of Charlotte.  We got there around 9am, took a brief tour of the facility, prepared food, and served lunch to approximately 200 guys.  The staff at the Men's Shelter are so delightful and it was a great opportunity to reach out and do something constructive in the community.  Here's a picture of me with my "gem" of a boss, Jim, getting ready to serve it up!

Way to go, Team Bank of America!