3 Words You Never Expect to Hear ...

 ... "you have cancer" ... or in my case, "you have breast cancer."  Last week I received a phone call from my radiologist confirming my worst fear.  You might be asking yourself how on earth this is possible?  There is no natural history of it in my family and I'm only 30 years old.  This seems absolutely crazy!  Well I obviously can't tell you how I got cancer (although I have a pretty good theory), all I can tell you is that it's definitely in there and now we have to create a plan to get rid of it as soon as possible.  Here's the backstory:

About a month ago, I found a lump in my left breast.  I had just stopped breastfeeding (rather abruptly) so I assumed it was just a plugged milk duct (as all my research was pointing to).  I just so happened to have an appt. scheduled with my OB the following week, so I asked him to take a look at it.  After an exam and ultrasound, he agreed with me that it was probably just a glandular issue but to be on the safe side, he referred me to a surgeon friend for a closer look.  We then proceeded to that appt. and her medical diagnosis was the same.  But again, to be absolutely sure, she ordered a mammogram at the radiologists office for definitive results.  After 2 hours of imaging and ultrasounds, the radiologist found 3 very "suspicious" areas - the lump, a nearby lymph node, and a cluster of calcifications (calcium deposits) just above the lump.  So he ordered 3 biopsies to be done.  Last Tuesday I completed those biopsies (which were a doozy!) and patiently waited for the results.  Around noon on Thursday, the call came in from my radiologist.  "Melody," she said, "I have your results and unfortunately I have some bad news" ... instantly my body began to shake ... "first off, we need to see you back in our office to re-biopsy the lymph node, we didn't get a good enough sample to get a proper diagnosis.  Secondly, the other two biopsies did come back positive for breast cancer."  She was pretty sure that a full mastectomy would be ordered, but would defer to the surgeon and oncologist to set my course for treatment from this point on.  I have seen 5 different doctor's over the last 4 weeks, 4 of them referred me to the exact same surgeon claiming he is the absolute best of the best in this area.  Similarly, we have received nearly the same amount of referrals for the oncologist we've chosen as he, too, is the best in his field.  We certainly take comfort in the level of confidence these 2 doctors have received from the peers and we feel like we're certainly in the best hands possible.  I have been assured that at the end of it all, I will be just fine - this is not the end all, be all for me.  But it will be rough, no doubt.  Either major surgery and/or chemotherapy will be required of me and if nothing else, that's enough to break one's spirit.

Now that the medical "stuff" is out of the way, I can also claim, with full confidence, that my God always goes before me and this is not new news to Him.  I believe it was no accident that our beloved pastor, Pastor Clint, made the comment on Sunday that wherever God calls you, He goes with you.  Thank goodness!  I could never make it through this without his grace covering my entire life.  I'm often reminded of Job's story in the Bible.  When Satan questioned God about Job, His response was very clear ... Job was found righteous in the eyes of God.  God allowed Satan to strip Job of everything he had - family, possessions, even his health - because he was confident that Job would remain upright through it all.  Perhaps God continues to allow bad thing after bad thing to happen to our family because He has found me righteous in His eyes and knows that our testimony can be an effective means of sharing the gospel with the world around us.  A dear friend reminded me this week of 2 very important things: The battle belongs to the Lord and He WILL be with me (2 Chron. 20:15 & Ps. 118:6).  If I can keep my eyes focused on Him throughout this entire process, as hard as it is guaranteed to be, I know that I will in fact be okay.  In the meantime, we covet all your prayers as this has radically shaken our family and will change a lot of things going forward.  I'm very sad to battling this at the same time that I should be enjoying all my daughter's magical "firsts" - first Halloween, first Thanksgiving, first Christmas, etc. as well as her milestones - teaching her how to roll over, crawl, eat her veggies/fruits, etc. :)  But the focus now shifts to me for a short while and getting me healthy so I can go on being Audrey's mommy and Chris' wife for a very long time!

Happy Anniversary!

This week we celebrated our 9-year wedding anniversary.  I can't believe it's been that long already.  Sometimes I feel like we were just married yesterday.  But then I think about all that we have experienced together over the last 9 years and it feels like we've been together for a lifetime!  This year I asked for 2 things:  1. an emerald ring (sort of a late mother's day gift as well) - this is Audrey's birthstone, and 2. a full night's sleep with breakfast in bed!  I don't know which gift I was more excited about! lol!  So we decided to make a hotel reservation at the new Renaissance North Hills hotel in Raleigh and leave our sweet baby girl with her grammy overnight.  As much as I missed her (SOOOOO very much!), it was a great decision to sneak away and reconnect after 3 months of major life change.  We also made a dinner reservation at the Bonefish Grill about a block from our hotel ... it was delicious!  I don't think either of  us had ever been there before so we were really looking forward to it.  I tried something new, swordfish Oscar with whipped potatoes and summer tomatoes.  It was amazing!  I topped it off with savory creme brulee and left completely satisfied by that delicious meal! Afterwards, we walked back towards the hotel, but in no hurry as there was a lovely summer wind blowing through and it made for a very enjoyable evening stroll.  As wonderful as all that was, my favorite part was waking up to the sound of room service the very next morning bringing me my long-awaited, much-anticipated breakfast in bed!  Pancakes, eggs, bacon, potatoes, whole wheat toast, fresh squeezed orange juice, and coffee . . . YUM-MY!!!  What a wonderful way to end our anniversary getaway!  It was wonderful to spend that time alone together just reconnecting with each other and rekindling the romance that tends to land on the back burner after something like having a baby and changing your world forever :)

Happy 9-year anniversary, Chris Harrell.  I love you so very much!

We Had A Baby!

We can finally announce the arrival of our firstborn child, Audrey Elizabeth Harrell!  She was born on May 2, 2012 at 8:32pm.  It was a gorgeous spring day and the perfect day to welcome a new baby into this world!  She weighed 8lbs 8oz and measured 21 inches long.  We are thrilled to finally have her here and life as we know it now will never be the same again :)

Nursery Furniture - Before & After

So, the reason I haven't blogged in a while is because I've had my hands full with designing this nursery for our baby girl.  Even though Chris has done nearly all the work, my mind has been completely preoccupied with this for months!  However, I absolutely HAD to take the time to blog about my precious husband and the amazing work he has done on Audrey's nursery furniture.  Over the last year, we have really enjoyed learning about how to buy thriftily and refinish old furniture to create unique, trendy, and CHEAP new furniture!  Fortunately for us, Audrey's nursery furniture came free, it just needed a little TLC to make it what we wanted in her room.  The furniture generously came from my sweet great-grandmother.  We were in her home one Sunday afternoon picking up a sewing machine she has offered to me and we saw this furniture.  Instantly, Chris and I both loved the design of it and knew it would be perfect nursery furniture.  So we asked my grandma if we could take it home with us, and she agreed!

Here are pictures of the 2 pieces of furniture in their original state (from the 1950's) - BEFORE SHOT

chest of drawers

dresser

 And after COUNTLESS days and hours of sanding, priming, taping, and painting, here are pictures of the beautiful furniture now - AFTER SHOT

We still have one more step to do before we can put this project to bed.  The hardware still needs to be put back on :)  We have chosen to spray paint the hardware an oil-rubbed bronze to give it an overall polished finish.  All the colors look so great together!  It's hard to tell in these pictures, but we painted the furniture antique white, painted the tops navy blue, and added a coral pink design.  Add in the bronze hardware and it will all come together perfectly!

Happy Birthday, Mom!

This weekend was my mom's 54th birthday (and no, she looks no where near 54 years old!).  So Chris, Autumn, and I packed up the car and headed towards Raleigh.  We had a wonderful weekend together!  We enjoyed a trip to one of our absolute favorite places, the Wake Forest Tea Room, visited my dad's gravesite and dropped off some flowers, and even had time to squeeze in a little surprise party with all her Meredith College girls :)  It was delightful, all kinds of fun!  I ate entirely too much food over the course of the weekend, which I will be paying for for a while (boo) :(  We also had a chance to enjoy a birthday lunch with my grandparents before heading back to Concord today.  Here are a few pics from mom's special lunch at the Japanese restaurant.

Happy birthday, mom!  Hope you enjoyed it as much as we did!

A Surprise In My Mailbox

In today's mail was an unexpected surprise :)  My sister-in-law along with our darling niece and nephew sent us the sweetest card to let us know they were thinking about us and sad to hear about our Sadie girl.  They knew we were sad and thought this might be a nice way to cheer us up.  They were right!  We found this card to be very thoughtful and endearing and it did make us feel better :)

Uncle Chris & Cade

Aunt Melody & Natalie

Thanks, Herman gang, for cheering us up!

Time to Say Goodbye

A few months ago, I posted about our precious dog, Sadie, and how we had recently discovered that she was diagnosed with lymphoma (cancer).  The few months we had together flew like the wind and this week it became terribly clear that it was time to let her go.  She was absolutely miserable and suffering immensely, but neither of us had enough courage to make the decision about when to let her go.  Unfortunately, she told us herself last night, in her own special way, that the time had finally come.  We had decided to schedule the appointment at the vet's office for Friday, 2/17, but she took a drastic turn for the worse today and it was clear that we couldn't wait even 1 more day (for her sake).  Let me just say, this was devastating for us both.  I had to leave work at 10:30am this morning because I hadn't stopped crying for 3 hours and knew I was not gonna make it through the rest of the day.  We scheduled the appointment for 4pm this afternoon and I came home asap to spend our remaining hours together, just Sadie and I.  I made a pallet of blankets and pillows on the floor and curled my body around hers for the next several hours.  I just cried and cried until I ran out of tears (temporarily).  Chris came home around 3:30pm to pick us up.  We went to the vet together as a family.  After the doctor informed us about the process of putting her to sleep, she left the room for a few minutes to allow us to say our goodbyes.  This was heart wrenching.  Truly devastating for us both.  It's always so upsetting for me to watch my husband cry, I know his heart was breaking and I couldn't do anything about it.  Shortly after, the doctor came back into the room and took special care of our Sadie for the very last time.  Afterwards, as we attempted to drive away from the vet's office, we recounted to each other how perfect our Sadie really was for us and all the things we loved about her so much.  It's hard to imagine that we will ever find that kind of perfect fit again in another dog, but we can hope so.

Here are some pics we took over the last few weeks together.  These are Sadie-girl's last pictures with us.

Precious Sadie, you were the best friend and companion we could have ever hoped for.  You will be missed everyday and we will continue to love you with all our hearts even after you're gone.

Happy Birthentine's Day!

Last night, Chris and I celebrated our newest tradition . . . birthentine's day!  Allow me to explain.  Valentine's day is on February 14th and Chris's birthday is on February 16th, so we decided ever year from now on we would combine both events into 1 holiday and celebrate together on February 15th instead.  You may feel like one or both of us gets jipped a little by doing this, but in all reality, Vday was never a holiday we celebrated anyways and Chris isn't big on birthday celebrations.  So it actually turns out better for us both because we're acknowledging our love and happy marriage while not making a big deal of Chris's birthday :)

This year we went out to dinner at Mickey & Mooch restaurant in the Lake Norman area.  We both enjoyed a delicious NY Strip steak with our choice of side items and topped it off with a little tuxedo cheesecake and decaf coffee :)  It was amazing - absolutely delicious!  It was just so nice to sit down for a special meal together and put all the stresses of everyday life on the shelf for a while.

Here are 2 pictures from our first birthentine's day.  I apologize that the second picture below is a little blurry :(

A Big Week!

We're as busy as little worker bees these days trying to get everything ready for our baby girl to arrive (in only 16 weeks!).  This was a big week in particular.  After 3 1/2 years of driving around our FABULOUS Toyota Highlander, we were finally able to pay off the remaining balance on the car and we now own it free and clear!  AWESOME!  This was one big step towards amending my work schedule as much as possible after Audrey gets here.  Next we purchased a sleeper sofa from an acquaintance we met on Craigs List.  The sleeper sofa takes the place of the queen bed we had in our guest room since we're now having to shuffle rooms upstairs and make that room in particular as multi-functional as possible.  After searching and searching for a few months now, we had some great luck this week in finding our new couch!  It's a 2008 La-z-boy sleeper sofa and still in EXCELLENT condition!  Compared to the retail selling price listed, we walked away with this "new" couch for a third of the price!  What a great deal!  And last but certainly not least, we spontaneously stopped by the baby consignment store in Mooresville today on our way home from picking up the sofa and ended up driving away with Audrey's entire travel system!  We loved the look of it instantly, but rather than getting carried away with our "excitement", Chris pulled out his smart phone and starting researching the system first.  After a few minutes, we read that it received superb reviews and that it is a high quality, top of the line travel system.  So we inquired of the store manager a little further and drove away with it for less than half price!  Holy moly!   It's rewarding to see the benefits of our frugality and patience!  I don't think we'll ever pay full price for anything ever again :)

A Hard Lesson to Learn

This week was a tough one.  We received some terrible news on Tuesday that some dear friends of ours delivered a full term stillborn baby.  This was shocking news indeed.  I felt like it shook me to the core and I'm still in tears every time I think about it.  Baby Maddox was due to enter this world to 2 loving parents anxiously expecting his arrival right before Christmas.  To receive the news that your baby no longer has a heartbeat after carrying it in your womb (successfully I might add) for 39 weeks is beyond unbearable - it's completely incomprehensible.  This is certainly one of those times when you just look up at God and question what His plan could possibly be through this?  It's been a delicate week as all of their friends/family have tried to tenderly minister to their broken hearts.

Needless to say, it has certainly made Chris and I step back and be reminded of the gift we have been given through this baby we are expecting in May.  I feel even more protective of it now than ever before.  I know that God ultimately controls what happens througout this pregnancy and after it is born, just like He did with Maddox, but I can still do everything in my power to protect it as much as possible,  Which brings me to my next point . . .

While sharing my sorrows with a friend this week, she reminded me that the worry for our children doesn't stop after we give birth, it will carry on into the rest of their lives.  She said that it's a daily struggle to wake up and purposefully remember that her son is not her own, he belongs to God, and ultimately it is God's protection and plan for his life that matters most.  She is simply a vessel that has been entrusted with the responsibility of taking care of him for as long as God allows on this earth.  To be honest, I hadn't really thought of that before.  But when hit with the news that we received this week, I am so grateful to have been taught that lesson now.

I'm reminded of the story in the Bible of Hannah and Samuel.  Hannah desperately prayed for a child for a very long time.  After a considerable time of waiting, The Lord blessed her with a son, Samuel.  In her dedication of Samuel to the Lord, she says "I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD."

What a sweet reminder of what it is we are specifically called to do as parents.  We can try and hold on to our children as tight as possible and protect them as much as possible, but we'll be doing ourselves a huge favor if we turn them over to the Lord to fulfill His plan for their lives instead.  And it would be a huge disservice to our children if we didn't teach them this valuable lesson about God's sovereignty and perfect plan for us all.  This is not to say that the responsibility of parenthood is easier as a result, but it can certainly be more peaceful.

So to our dear friends, Andrew and Amanda, we are mourning your loss with you but are grateful for the testimony you have shown us as expecting parents and pray that we are able to handle life's tragedies as well as you are thanks to the saving grace of Jesus Christ and the intercession of the holy spirit in our hearts.

Christmas Time is Here

Christmas is upon us in full force!  As previously mentioned, I've been super jazzed about the holidays this year (there's no explanation whatsoever for that except that perhaps I'm just really looking forward to what's to come next year).  This year I wanted to change up the look of our holiday decor a little bit.  Typically it's just the standard array of decorations that we've collected over the years - none of which match or make any decorating sense whatsoever :)  So this year I wanted to spruce the place up a bit!  I spent countless hours on my new favorite website (pinterest) looking for improved decorating ideas.  I think we did pretty good :)  The best part is that MOST (not all) of the decorations were from the Dollar Store of all places!  If you get there early enough, they have an amazing assortment of fabulous holiday finds :)

view of our living room from the dining room

our 2011 mantel

2011 red and gold Christmas tree

our poinsettia and pinecone garland.  I'm especially proud of this project :)  I had found a similar 6' garland at Hobby Lobby on sale (50% off) for $30.  I knew it was going to take a least 3 strands to cover our staircase and spending $90 was completely out of the question!  So I went to Wally world instead and bought an 18' pre-lit garland and 3 6' poinsettia/pinecone garlands, strung them together and voila . . . a $90 concept for a $25 sticker price.  Not a bad compromise at all!

our breakfast nook ready to welcome our guests for dinner

our first Christmas dinner party with our "new" dining room furniture

first time in 8 years we've been able to display our Christmas china!  This means a lot to me as it was a specific gift from my parents when I was first married.

just another view of the living room/foyer from the dining room

All in all, I think we did a pretty good job with the limited resources we had to spare.  It sure it nice and cozy to come home too as well!  It's really beautiful all lit up!  I just love the magic of the holidays :)

It's a DIY Kind of Christmas!

I don't know why, but for some strange reason I am super excited about the holiday season this year.  I know it's not gonna be the same - there won't really be presents, both sides of the family are under a lot of stress, and it will be my first christmas ever without my dad - but despite all of that, the magic of christmas is still in the air!  I decided to change up our christmas decor this year to something hopefully a little more snazzy (to be displayed in a later post).  I've been spending a lot of time on favorite blogs and pinterest to help gain a little inspiration.  There were a few little projects that I just loved, so I decided to give them a try over the weekend.  I apologize for the bad pictures, wasn't really planning to post them so they're not the best quality or angle :(

First Project: The Ornament Wreath

I loved everything about this project!  It was SO easy and the best part is that all the supplies needed I either already had or I purchased at the Dollar Store!  All you do is take a wire coat hanger and start threading the christmas ornaments onto it until it's nice and full.  Then twist the ends at the very top and add some ribbon so you can hang it from the door hook.  Voila!  Thats it!  It cost me about $10 in supplies and about 1 hour of my time :)  I plan to hang this wreath on the front door and then put 2 more on the french doors in our dining room :)

Second Project: Christmas Canvases



I saw this idea on "Thrifty Decor Chic" - one of my favorite blogs to follow.  The concept is simple.  Take 3 canvases, cover them in Christmas fabric, then spraypaint wooden letters in a corresponding color (I chose a glittery green).  I believe I will also frame them in thick white frames (minus the glass) and then we'll hang them on the wall above the mantel/fireplace.  This project cost me about $32 (a little more pricey - but all the associated costs are variable so you can make it cheaper if you need to) and about 2 hours of my time (mostly because of the time spent spraypainting and drying).  Can't wait to see how it looks over the mantel!

Third Project: Framed Christmas Prints

While I was wasting my time one day perusing through the countless ideas on Pinterest, I came across this idea.  The concept here is that you print off some Christmas prints (my favorite is the one on the right from "Elf"), matte/frame them, and then hang them on the wall using corresponding grossgrain ribbon (haven't done that part yet).  The prints were free b/c I was able to just print them directly off the website, the frames (11x14) are from the dollar store, and the mattes (8x10) are from Wal Mart.  This project cost me $9 and about 2 hours of time.  The frames did not come in white, I had to paint them - but it saved me a ton of money instead, so it was worth the extra time involved.  Love it!

I am really looking forward to getting all of these new projects out in the house and seeing how it all comes together!  Bring on the Christmas season!

Happy Halloween from the Harrell's!

This year for our annual Sunday School costume party, we decided not to go with a standard couples costume.  Chris felt "inspired" to dress up as our Sr. Pastor at church (Pastor Clint Pressley).  We drove around all day on Saturday to locate all the pieces of his costume (which mostly came from the ol' faithful Value Village and Party City).  My costume, on the other hand, was completely homemade (by both our hard-working hands) and it is by far my favorite cosstume of all!  I chose to go as a Bun in the Oven (lol).  I felt it was quite appropriate this year :)  Even though my costume required a little more "creativity", Chris still took home the coveted "Best Costume" award at the party (for the 4th time in a row).  Man he's good!

Tis the Season!

I know that it's still WAY too early to be thinking about Christmas, but I saw these 2 fabulous ideas on Pinterest today and I knew that if I didn't blog about them I would totally forget about them altogether!

First: A Christmas card AND newsletter in one!  I just love the idea!

Unfortunately, this will NOT be the year we will send these out.  Can't say I can even think of 10 good things worth listing on this card.  But next year will certainly be better (topping the list will be the birth of our child!).

Secondly, there's the smells of the season to help get you in that special holiday mood!  I just love when my house smells of apple and spices - reminds me of being at home in Raleigh and all the wonderful Christmases we had together as a family.

A Home Makeover

Our house is in serious need of a home makeover prior to the baby's arrival.  I just know that if we don't get it done before then, it'll never happen!  Here are a few ideas I found on Pinterest today that I really love!

Towel Rack - Guest Bathroom


Oil Rubbed Bronze Fixtures


Wall Photo Gallery
(pic won't display)

Master Bedroom

These are just a few little projects to help get us started (well . . . except for the whole bedroom makeover - but we've kind of got the ball rolling for that already anyways).  But before we can even tackle this small list, we have to finish our kitchen remodel, paint our 2-story foyer, and replace all the flooring downstairs (and eventually upstairs as well).  All within the next 6 months!  OH!  And create a baby nursery as well!!!!  Yikes!  There goes our social life for a while (lol)!